Living Together in North Dakota

As further proof that you don’t have to be all that bright to be elected to your state’s house of representatives, the North Dakota house has just tossed out a 116-year-old law that prohibited unmarried couples from living together—by a vote of 48-41.

48-41!

The law had been in place since North Dakota became a state, and according to the AP story it made living together without being married a sex crime. And 41 North Dakota legislators looked deep in their hearts in the year 2007 and thought “Yes, that makes sense.”

Rumor has it that these 41 are desperately trying to drum up support for a new law that would prohibit the mixing of male and female clothing in any given load of laundry—along with open-mouthed kissing, foot massages, and the use of the word “moist.”

The North Dakota Family Alliance wanted the law left on the books because they’re vehemently opposed to the idea of people saving money by splitting the cost of rent and utilities. No, not really—I’m just messing with you. The words “family alliance” gave it away: They don’t want you to have sex unless you get it authorized by the county clerk and have the forms submitted to God. Then it’s okay.

Congratulations to the North Dakota legislators who realized that it’s none of the government’s business who lives where and with whom. To the other 41 and the constituents they represent, take heart: This won’t affect you in the least.

* * * *

This marks the second straight post that contains the phrase “won’t affect you in the least.” Seems to be a recurring theme here at the Runes--as well it should be. As Hank Williams put it, “Mind your own business and you won’t be minding mine.”